Monday, September 26, 2005

ok im ready for a booty call...jk

lol...yea i think that why the break up hurt so bad is bc i knew it was coming but i was afraid to be alone. And i didnt want to be the one left behind...i wanted to be the one who did the leaving....horrible i know but then it wouldnt have hurt so bad. But now that i look back on it, it really wasnt that surprising that david would wanna be with someone else...i mean i am really hard to handle..and i require A LOT of attention and i have to have constant affection, which david would rarely do...he didnt even like to hold hands. I remember walking down the hallway in school and i would go to hold his hand and he would jerk it away from me...that really hurt. I really think that david isnt ready to have a SERIOUS relationship, which is ok but hes gonna be breaking a lot of hearts. Or maybe he just couldnt handle having meas his gf. maybe he just couldnt handle having to care for another person. he prolly forced himself to love me bc i loved him. but w/e....its his loss bc other than the fact that i am spoiled and need constant attention..im not that bad. in a month he'll be regretting this and then u know what? its gonna be too late. i will stand strong and will not go back into his arms...i have no room forhim in my life anymore, well as a boyfriend. And i can proudly say that i no longer love david....for now...

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